The Seinfeld candidate

By Lightshines...

With all this exposing of the presidential candidates, Feist thought she'd chime in with this monologue from the "Seinfeld" candidate.

One Two Three Four
I told you I don’t sniff no more
Cocaine, bad nights
That was what my youth was for

I bring you hope right to your door
Of programs, nothing
Do you want some more?

Oh, oh, oh
I’m stealing your heart
Oh, oh, oh
“Nothing” is getting me far

Sweet talk, faint heart
You can tell I’m pretty smart
Cozy and bold
But on horse I didn’t start

Those clueless hopes
Who have stars in their eyes
I’m too scared to own up
To one little lie

Oh, oh, oh
I’m stealing your heart
Oh, oh, oh
“Nothing” is getting me far

One, two, three, four, five, six, nine, and ten
Money’s buying back the love you had for them
One, two, three, four, five, six, nine, and ten
Money’s buying back the love you had for them

Oh, oh, oh
I’m stealing your heart
Oh, oh, oh
“Nothing” is getting me far

Oh, oh, oh
I’m stealing your heart
Oh, oh, oh
“Nothing” is getting me far

I couldn't find a MIDI of the song, for those of you who like to sing along. Here's a music video for those of you (like me) who never heard of Feist or the song:

Feist Lyrics